06-23-2016, 03:33 PM
Join Date: Nov 2014
"Rumors of my death have been greatly exaggerated"
As is my custom, I go to the gym, shower and then worry and fret until it's time to go to the mall for coffee. Today I had to do the work of two hypochondriacs, as my wife had dinner plans with a friend.
I loaded up the UC2, checked the shine on my Harley boots, purloined beverage money from my wife and began the drive to the mall. I must admit, I'm sure glad Leonidas never met me, and that's about as low as a guy can go--when my cell phone rang...
It was my oral surgeon, my biopsy results were back and I am perfectly healthy. Then he told me the back story.
He quoted a chemical with a name so lengthy and complicated that even SnowTao would need three Asian professors and Thesaurus to untangle all the Latin and Greek adjuncts. I asked the surgeon what it was.
"Well, Chico, you big chicken," he drawled, "it's an additive used in toothpastes for whitening or are used in products to desensitize teeth. It appears you're allergic to this compound, and you had a reaction..."
I let that sink in and then responded, "You mean I had dry spot in my mouth because my wife changed brands?"
The rest of the exchange was equally dry, I asked about treatments, he told me it would heal on it's own. Then I had to do the hardest thing for me to do.
Oh, I apologized for my conduct and my demeanor. Everyone is afraid of something, but in effect, I got to walk off Thermopylae.
Lay on the insults, guys, I've earned them...
...No matter where you are it's enemy territory...