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Old 10-28-2016, 01:54 PM   #1
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Phrase anthologies

In old, small villages, local folks started running out of places to bury people. So they would dig up coffins and would take the bones to a bone-house, and reuse the grave. When reopening these coffins, 1 out of 25 coffins were found to have scratch marks on the inside, and they realized they had been burying people alive. So they would tie a string on the wrist of the corpse, lead it through the coffin and up through the ground and tie it to a bell. Someone would have to sit out in the graveyard all night (the graveyard shift) to listen for the bell. Thus, someone could be saved by the bell, or was considered a dead ringer.

Lead cups were used to drink ale or whisky. The combination would sometimes knock the imbibers out for a couple of days. Someone walking along the road would take them for dead and prepare them for burial. They were laid out on the kitchen table for a couple of days and the family would gather around and eat and drink and wait and see if they would wake up. Hence the custom of holding a wake.

Those with money had plates made of pewter. Food with high acid content caused some of the lead to leach onto the food, causing lead poisoning death. This happened most often
with tomatoes, so for the next 400 years or so, tomatoes were considered poisonous.

Bread was divided according to status. Workers got the burnt bottom of the loaf, the family got the middle, and guests got the top, or the upper crust.

In those old days, they cooked in the kitchen with a big kettle that always hung over the fire. Every day, they lit the fire and added things to the pot. They ate mostly vegetables and did not get much meat. They would eat the stew for dinner, leaving leftovers in the pot to get cold overnight and then start over the next day. Sometimes stew had food in it that had been there for quite a while. Hence the rhyme, Peas porridge hot, peas porridge cold, peas porridge in the pot nine days old.

Sometimes they could obtain pork, which made them feel quite special. When visitors came over, they would hang up their bacon to show off. It was a sign of wealth that a man could bring home the bacon. They would cut off a
little to share with guests, and would all sit around and chew the fat.

The floor was dirt, only the wealthy had something other than dirt. Hence the term, dirt poor.

The wealthy had slate floors that would get slippery in the winter when wet, so they spread thresh (straw) on the floor to help keep their footing. As the winter wore on, they added more thresh until, when you opened the door, it would all start slipping outside. A piece of wood was placed in the entrance-way. Hence, a thresh hold.

Houses had thatched roofs with thick straw-piled high and no wood underneath. It was the only place for animals to get warm, so all the cats and other small animals (mice, bugs) lived in the roof. When it rained, it became slippery and sometimes the animals would slip and fall off the roof. Hence the saying, Itís raining cats and dogs.

There was nothing to stop things from falling into the house. This posed a real problem in the bedroom where bugs and other droppings could mess up your nice clean bed. Hence, a bed with big posts and a sheet hung over the top afforded some protection. Thatís how canopy beds came into existence.

Baths consisted of a big tub filled with hot water. The man of the house had the privilege of the nice clean water, then all the other sons and men, then the women, and finally the children. Last of all the babies. By then the water was so dirty you could actually lose someone in it. Hence the saying, Donít throw the baby out with the bath water!

Most people got married in June because they took their yearly bath in May, and they still smelled pretty good by June. However, since they were starting to smell, brides carried a bouquet of flowers to hide the body odor. Hence the custom
today of carrying a bouquet when getting married.

They used to use urine to tan animal skins, so families used to all pee in a pot. Once a day it was taken and sold to the tannery. If you had to do this to survive, you were piss poor.

But worse than that were the really poor folks who couldnít even afford to buy a pot. They didnít have a pot to piss in and were considered the lowest of the low.
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Old 10-28-2016, 03:12 PM   #2
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I guess Chuck has just redefined "The Good old Days"!!!!
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Old 10-28-2016, 03:24 PM   #3
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Interesting. I printed it for my Wife to read. I'm not doing anything but hittin the bourbon already.
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Old 10-28-2016, 05:24 PM   #4
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Originally Posted by RugerLuger View Post
Interesting. I printed it for my Wife to read. I'm not doing anything but hittin the bourbon already.
I like the way you think Mike.
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Old 10-28-2016, 06:32 PM   #5
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And the day after Election Day some of this may start all over again.
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Old 10-28-2016, 07:27 PM   #6
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Chuck I am really impressed that you were able to remember your childhood with such clarity!
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Old 10-31-2016, 01:04 AM   #7
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Cool

Good stuff, Chuck!! Thanks for sharing!!
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