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Old 04-11-2019, 09:06 AM   #1
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There's an old Sicilian adage that goes...

..."no good deed goes unpunished."

I got up early this morning to return a repaired and polished Barge to a barista at B&N. I had sipped some hot, sweet coffee, when the inky sky lit up with the loudest, brightest lightning I had seen in quite a while. I decided to get out to my truck before the front would start dropping rain.

Half-way home I realized that my wife had no Starbuck's tea, and she'd never venture out in this, so I pulled into their east side customers' lot. Their parking slots are notoriously narrow, and I have an F150. Naturally some mouthy lady with a cell phone glued to her head had parked crooked next to that only spot.

I did a triple axel getting out of my truck, stood in line, got my wife's complicated drink (which I keep on a list in my biker jacket so I don't forget the ingredients) and got back to my truck.

Little Miss Sunshine was still on the phone, still parked crooked and now she had found a mouth. I derided her in succinct conversational Sicilian--including my thumbnail against my frontal bicuspid--and left.

My wife was just getting up and was glad she had a hot, green, foaming venti tea--just like the written instructions told me. I mentioned the loudmouth.

Private parking lots are not covered by law in Wisconsin. I could have taken a wrecking ball to that car and phone and only got a suggestion from the local cops to "call my insurance agent." I didn't know getting cussed out by a menopausal nutjob was actionable in any court of law.

So, be advised, if you come to the 'burbs here, just drop me off and I'll get your coffee. Sometimes I speak Sicilian like a main-lander, and I forget all the inflections--drives my cousin Alan nuts.

The good news is that I'm learning the diatribes of the locals.

Who in their right mind cusses bikers now?
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Last edited by The Tourist; 04-11-2019 at 09:35 AM.
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